Life is Irrecoverably Wasted ...

I am not sure exactly why am I writing to you and why do I choose to write here. I suppose you will read this sooner or later, or maybe you won’t read it at all, and may be then you will understand. I think I write this for my sake as well… to keep some sort of record so that I can be reminded of this time in my weak moments. I wonder where we went wrong, I wonder what we did that takes us just a second to turn so cold from being all caring, loving and honest. The unpredictability that we have just gives me the chills. I wonder about the mood swings, the sarcastic comments, the whinnings and the downright awful fights. After weeks and weeks of efforts, I am forcing myself to accept that you were right. You were right when you told me that we can never take the middle road. It is always one extreme or another. Oh, how so much I wish we could take the middle road—at least I would still have the same friend. I cherish your friendship. More than anything else, I cherish o...

Sayang..  Apa yang ku katakan  Apa yang ku rasakan  Belum pernah dialami  Demimu segala ku kurniakan  Susah ku senangkan  Apa sahaja dipenuhi  Di hati ... Dan masih lagi engkau bertanya  Sejauh manakah cinta  Penjelasan ku sebenar-benarnya; Sampai, tubuh tak bernyawa  Sampai, ku ke pangkuannya  Biar jasad tak dilihat zahir  Cintaku kan tetapkan hadir  Andai dikurnia syurga  Kan ku tunggu di luarnya  Jika ditanya mengapa?  Jawapan ku menunggu..  Kau SAMPAI dahulu..  Mudahnya sekadar bermadah  Hingga kau meragui  Keikhlasan sanubari  Sedangkan racun pun kan ku telan  Andai kau menyatakan ia madu kepadaku  Oh sungguh..  Dan masih lagi kau bertanya  Sedalam manakah cinta?  Lafaz ikrarku buat selamanya...  Katakan sayang..  Bagaimanakah harus ku hidup.. tanpa dirimu Sed...

I wrote this quite sometime ago.. things are going okay now, with no complaint. But still I wanted to share one last beautiful memory of us.. 15 years 2 months 8 days = 5546 days ago..  Our first looks at each other, our first conversation, our first kiss. Our first hand written letter and our first real talk. I'll never forget. Never forget the feelings and how perfect everything was. We could be awake and talk about everything until the next morning, we could talk in the phone for hours without having any words left to say and we could lay down for a very long time and just stare into each others eyes without saying anything. Her lullaby's for me while I fall asleep most of the time.. It was love. Real love. We became closer and closer and when i thought it couldn't be better she whispered the three most beautiful words in my ear. She whispered "I love you" with a tear in her eye and said that she never thought she could have this feelings for a...

Mencipta rasa jiwa.  Menjelma rasa bahagia.  Ingin dicinta.  Atas bukan nama cinta.  Menjadi satu rahsia.  Menyekat seribu cerita dunia.  Indah tak terucap kata.  Atas kasih tanpa kecewa.  Rapatnya kita.

People… We love them, hate them, care about them, be friends with them, share them, compromise them, wish for them, crave them- however we feel about them we have to deal with them! Unfortunately there is no other way out. People are all around us. People are our family, our friends, our neighbors and people are complete strangers too. I wonder what makes them strangers and what makes them friends? I sometimes wonder how we should interact with people. True, that every person is different from the other and there are no rules laid out for the best way to interact with people and you have to give every friendship and relationship some time in order to answer that question. I know I am being redundant here, using the word “People” in every sentence but I don’t know, for some strange reason this word is just stuck in my head tonight. I can’t seem to be able to take it out neither do I find the words to explain my thoughts but I am trying. I just hope it makes sense. I loved some pe...

Down memory lane.. That morning started as usual.. As it was Monday so we had morning assembly.. I was sitting along the corridor of our classroom.. A fellow schoolmate walked pass.. I could smell that nice sweet scent which at that point I knew it was that famous talcum "Carrie" her pen fell in front of me, I picked it up hand it to her, she smile and thank me.. While I just nod.. A couple of weeks later, I was making my way to class walked pass the washroom... I heard like someone crying and sobbing real loud... So, curious, I walked in and saw her crying head against the sink... didn't really know what to do so I hand her a piece of tissue.. She took it.. wiped her tears and look straight into my eyes.. and me acting cool, just gave her a hug..  Was sweet but weird, for I've never ever done anything like that... That afternoon after school, while I was walking out our school gate I saw her standing by the trees with her friends... I heard her said, "...

Suram malam disulami dingin  Aku keseorangan menunggu pagi  Dalam gelap menahan angin  Yang dalam hati mahu dihalau pergi  Rasa ini diragut lagi  Walau cuma tinggal sisa  Luka lama beralih sisi  Terasa dihimpit terbenam seksa  Mungkin telah tiba pengakhiran  Di manakah permulaan, tidak ku ketahui  Legap haluan di manakah jalan?  Ku meraba melangkah  Dan masih terus mencari...